‘My colleague wants to bring her baby to the Christmas party – she’s furious we said no’

Parenthood is great, but let’s face it, we could all do with a bit of me-time away from baby duties sometimes. A work’s Christmas party is a case in point.

But, as any new parent will tell you, a baby is practically attached to you. They are dependent completely on mum or dad for all their needs.

Does this mean mum and dad have to sacrifice a night off because of baby on the hip? It’s a bit of a tricky situation facing a worker who posted their dilemma on Reddit in the hope of getting some solid advice over an imminent Christmas works adults-only party.

It’s a thorny issue because one of their colleagues has a new baby and assumes she can bring it.

They said: “I and my coworkers (mostly late 20s and early 30s), all without children, decided to have an early conference just for our department next week. We plan to go to a pub around 7pm, get some beers and so on.”

“We made a group chat and started to discuss where to go and what time. One of our co-workers is friend with co-worker on maternity leave so they added her to the chat too.”

“She was happy to come and told us she will attend with her son, who is currently 5 months.”

The Christmas party suddenly took on a different format with this suggestion, as children were not part of the plan.

Risking offence and upset, the co-worker stood their ground: “I told her that I don’t think it’s good idea to take him with her since we are probably gonna [sic] be loud and drinking and he’s gonna be crying and it’s also kinda [sic] late.”

“She told me it’s fine and that she takes him everywhere with her. She even took him to her husband’s conference where he has presentation and he didn’t cry much.”

Other colleagues then ploughed in and stressed to her a Christmas party with lots of drinking probably isn’t the best place for a 5-month-old.

“We said if she does not have babysitter we can change to more suitable day.”

“She said she does not want to be separated from her baby and called us as. The only person who took her side was her friend.”

They are now feeling a bit guilty and wonder if they did the right thing. There were plenty who had something to say for the post attracted nearly a thousand comments.

One person wrote: “I’ve taken a 5 day old baby to a pub before. Babies are extremely portable and adaptable.”

Many others said adult-only events are perfectly acceptable: “I hate when people want to drag their baby everywhere. Not everything is a kid event. Sometimes we want not-baby events.”

Self preservation adults, that’s why events like this are important said another: “It’s called self-care. It’s called adult time. It’s important for us to be not mom/dad and just us.”

Similarly: “Nobody else is bringing a child, not everyone is comfortable around babies, and adults are allowed to want adult only time.”